Bittersweet Moments Mold Me
Crud once again in a life altering phase, I reflect and stammer. As I continue to chase life and try to absorb everything the universe has to offer, the current journey dumped me into a valley. Head first into the adventure, I hit so hard I can literally see the purple bluish impressions through my skull.
No laughing matter as this plunge is reality and a pattern in my life. Could I pass blame on being an Aquarian or suck it up and realize I need spontaneity in life?
After turning 40 this year, I would like to refrain from saying I hit mid-life crisis, but rather a stark awakening of stability is surfacing. For the last 20 some odd years, I have no regrets leaving my roots in Canada, venturing off to the Middle East twice and living in six different states. But the journey through each season came with bittersweet moments that have molded me.
As I grow up and search for the new seed to plant, I ponder on what will fulfill the next season. Whole heartedly I do believe that you reap what you sow and if a harvest is empty, then divine spirituality is missing. There’s no lie that through chasing life that I feared death or bankruptcy and got knocked down so hard, I never saw light to get back up. But here I am today, as trying and turbulent these 40 years have been, life would not be as it stands today if I didn’t have God.
Those days when darkness set so low, I would kick God to the curb claiming that He did not love me. Then I sigh and remember that dreary night when I was dropped at the curb by a complete stranger in the Middle East, God picked me up off that curb and set me back on the path to life.
As bittersweet a moment can be at any given time in life, cherish it and thank God for the journey!
